Beyond Limiting Beliefs

Two weeks ago, my car broke down and I rolled my ankle on the same day. As a person who has come to believe there are no coincidences, I had to take a step back and wonder wtf?

It’s possible I rolled my ankle because my car broke down, since I was doing a work out to blow some steam about the cost of the repair. But, both circumstances at once put me in a hilariously challenging position of watching a 12 week old puppy, alongside my dog Mabel, where I can’t walk and my car’s in the shop.

The strangest part is how high I was flying the day before. It was Wednesday, my company’s Global Day of Joy, where we hone in our holiday magic and give back to the community. It’s one of my favorite perks about my job (second only to remote work, read more here). I was making blankets for the children’s hospital, writing cards for the senior center, baking and delivering treats to the fire department. The whole day was filled with delightful festive fun.

No clue what was about to happen...

So what happened?

Well, I’m starting to explore that I may have hit my upper limit problem. If you haven’t heard of this concept, it’s made famous by Gay Hendricks in The Big Leap. This book is free at the library and only a 5 hour listen, highly advise. There’s also a great summary here.

The upper limit concept explains how we subconsciously believe we are only capable of a certain amount of happiness, love, wealth, etc. and we will self-sabotage our successes in order to balance ourselves back to a place of familiarity.

For me, being sick and struggling with PTSD has become a place of familiarity. I was knocked right back into the couch, sleeping longer, and taking naps. My mind also went back to the all-too-familiar self-pity cycle - Why is this happening to me? Why me? Poor me.

Rest was what I needed to heal, but it’s not where I want to be now. There must be some hidden belief that surviving is all I can do. But I want more, I want to thrive, and need to find alignment within myself.

A wise mentor, my former intimacy coach Sophia Treyger advised me to read this book ages ago. She guided me through the four core upper limiting beliefs, listed below, which are described in further detail in The Big Leap.

1. I am broken

2. I am a burden

3. Don’t outshine anyone

4. Don’t be disloyal to the status quo

'Everything comes down to this' she would say.

I have been strategizing how to achieve my dream of becoming a published author. When this chaos happened, I was body checked back into a place of not believing I could do it. As I was hobbling around the kitchen on my rapidly swelling ankle, thinking about how I was going to get the dogs enough exercise and pick up a compression wrap and my car, I felt so alone and so far from my dreams.

While this injury to my body and wallet have been setbacks, I refuse to let them keep me from moving forward. Using this book to get out of my funk, I identified my unique ability of determination. I enjoy making executive decisions to organize ideas in my head. I love diving all in. And I want to make sure everyone knows these resources are available. We already have the answers to the questions we seek inside ourselves. Life is a journey of self discovery.

To find your unique ability, complete the following sentences.

• I am at my best when I…

• When I am at my best, I am doing…

• When I am doing that, the thing I love the most about it is…

Dive deep. Do it more than once. Pause. Have multiple answers to the same question. Fine tune. After doing this work, I am determined to become aware of my upper limiting beliefs and knock them down before they knock me down.