Cabin on the Hill - My Dream Home

I am writing this from my very first house. Almost a week ago, I officially closed on the cabin. In my bedroom, my new mattress sits on the ground dressed in a golden brown duvet the color of the summer sun setting on a field of grass. Which is exactly what I see when I look out the window. My bed frame supposedly arrives tomorrow, which is just one of the lessons reminding me to take it easy throughout this process.

It’s been a journey four years in the making, built on a lifetime of privilege and a little bit of luck. Four years ago is when I discovered black mold in the apartment I shared with my then boyfriend and roommate. I finally started to feel better after I moved in with my parents, dumped the dude, and had a steady dose of fresh air for several months.

I originally thought I would find another rental in Portland and move out of my parent’s house quickly. But life had other plans, and I am grateful for the shift in direction. The pandemic hit, I got sober, and as we sheltered in place, I saved as much money for a down payment as possible.

Let me be clear - I had a lot of help. This isn’t the independent woman story I thought it would be, but I’m hoping it will be better than I imagined. I am still a strong, resilient, powerful woman, but I don’t have to do it all alone. My family, my friends and my community have been, and will continue to be, vital to my success (I even wore my socks from The Vulva Art project for a walk around the property as a nod to how my history has built me).

The cabin is made of beautiful cedar logs with a wood fire stove, a covered front porch, and a back deck. It sits on five acres (yes, five!). I pinch my finger and thumb about an inch apart to tell people ‘I’m in a liiiiitle over my head.’ But the beauty of it all is the opportunity to grow into the person I want to become.

Living in a cabin has been a dream of mine since I started writing. Sitting in front the fire, swinging on the porch swing, sipping tea, writing and reading books - what’s not to love? It was a far off dream, not something I thought possible at this point in my life. The list of doubts was endless - I’m single, I don’t have enough money, I can’t do it alone, it’s too much, I don’t time, and on, and on.

When this cabin was first mentioned, I had just made an offer on a house in a nice neighborhood near Hazel Dell in Vancouver. It was a real fixer upper - all 60s decor still intact upstairs; an unfinished basement downstairs; a view directly into the neighbor’s backyard. It was still one of the better houses I had seen in my price range. I offered $8k over asking, but someone bought it for $50k more.

The day I finally scheduled to see the cabin, I made an offer on a townhome closer to the Vancouver mall. I had dashed my hopes of a big backyard for Mabel, location near nature, and was willing to settle for something, anything. I offered $5k over asking and was beat by an all cash offer. On a townhome! This housing market is no joke.

Finally, when I was working on a contract with the seller of the cabin - someone local - I shared the news with some of my closest friends. I was too scared to share more publicly until it was officially official somehow believing that the cabin might be taken away for boisterous behavior.

With years of waiting, and saving, offering, and not totally jinxing it, I thought buying the house of my dreams was the finish line, but in less than a week I’ve discovered it’s actually the starting line. I have the opportunity to build the life I love, with all the trees and honey bees and vegetables in the garden.

It’s definitely going to require some work, and a lot of growth. I’ve already had to use many coping skills during the stress of buying and moving (meditation, prayer, writing, talking about my feelings, taking breaks, re-evaluating, grounding, determining what tasks are actionable, yoga, Mabel snuggles, to name a few). My hope is to practice more patience, remember I am safe and whole even with unexpected obstacles. I believe this consciousness can bring a little more love and light into the world and we can all contribute.

Mabel is ecstatic, rocking her spiky Coyote color.

Connection Questions

1. Are you in the middle of buying a home?

- I feel ya! It's tough out there, but patience and trusting your instinct can help. Meditation was the number one thing for me to ensure I was aligned throughout each step of the process. I also recommend telling your people! It was amazing to have folks on the journey with me who were able to celebrate in the success when I finally completed a purchase.

2. Moving into your new home?

- OMG. The struggle is real. First of all, congratulations! It starts to feel a little less celebratory when the work begins, but it's still a big deal and you've worked hard for this. Moving is one of the biggest stressors in a person's life, so don't forget to be gentle. Recognize which dates are required, and which ones are self imposed. In other words - which balls are plastic, and which ones are made of glass? (Nora Robert's theory explained here)

3. Home expert?

- Experience in log cabins? Let's be friends. There is so much more awareness for flooring, bathrooms, deck builds, where to find wood, who to contract, etc. I would love insight if you have it and share what I've learned. As always you can find me on instagram.

Happy summer yall!